Connect with us

The Co-Dependent’s Recipe For Resentment

Adobe Stock


The Co-Dependent’s Recipe For Resentment

A simple glitch in my breakfast order reminded me how expectations, whether large or small, can quickly de-rail an otherwise lovely day.

Last Tuesday was tough, so to deal with my stress, I spent 30 minutes promising myself a Starbuck’s a blueberry muffin. When I got to Starbucks, they were out, and I was angry. I expected Starbucks to have everything on their menu. Instead, I ordered their new and flashy Sous Vide Egg bites.

Expectations In My Kitchen

It was love at first egg bite for me, but they are a little pricey. Ever since then, I’ve been trying to make these delicious eggs at home.

Sous Vide refers to a French technique of cooking where items are slow cooked in a warm water bath which results in a rich velvety texture. I don’t have, nor do I want to purchase, any of the required equipment to do this technique at home. The eggs have to be vacuum-sealed. It sounds messy and unappetizing.

At first, I tried cooking the eggs in my steamer. That didn’t work. Next, I tried baking the eggs in a warm water bath. That didn’t work either.

The problem is simple: I had another expectation. I expect to be able to repeat Starbuck’s success without using their recipe or their technique. In recovery, I’ve learned expectations are predetermined resentments. Expecting is the opposite of accepting.

Accepting brings serenity. Expecting brings anger. I brought all of this anger upon myself.

Recipe For Resentments

I have a choice to make about these eggs. The recipe I created was good. In fact, if I just sat down to eat those eggs, I might have really loved them. Instead, I was expecting something different. Now I must decide:

  • Will I accept the eggs I know how to make?


  • Do I want to learn something new and try this French technique in my home?

Stay tuned dear readers. Whether it’s fabulous or a fail, next week, I’ll be sharing the egg recipe I choose.

A Reach Out Recovery Exclusive By: Pam Carver




Pam is the author of Co-dependent In The Kitchen, and she’s a contributing editor for Recovery Guidance. She’s a recovery advocate who likes long walks on the beach and chocolate.

More in Co-Dependency



To Top