7 Warning Signs Of Passive Aggression
Passive aggression is a sneaky way to hide outright war. Every war, bar brawl or playground smackdown ever fought has resulted from our habit of lashing out first and talking it through only later. But if aggression has one virtue, it’s that it’s unambiguous. It’s hard to misunderstand the meaning of a missile launch or […]
How Does a Narcissist Think?
Source: lightwavemedia/Shutterstock Is the word narcissism being overused or thrown around too lightly? Do we need a deeper understanding of this behavior and why it is so harmful, and sometimes dangerous? Having studied the disorder for more than 25 years, and having treating many survivors of relationships with narcissists, I have seen firsthand how disarming, […]
A Lesson In Detaching With Love
Detaching with love does not come easily to me. In fact, as a people-pleasing codependent, I’ve spent a lifetime caring for others in an unfruitful way, and not detaching at all. Here’s my story of overreacting when things don’t go my way. My story of detaching with love begins with an orange tree I rushed […]
Beware The Rubber Band of Recovery Language
Recovery language can feel manipulative. But don’t be surprised when people in recovery use their newly acquired recovery language to continue to control others. Behavior doesn’t improve overnight. The truth is where there is alcohol and substance use, destructive conditioning has actually changed everything about us. Our personalities are completely altered, and don’t return to […]
Understanding Anger and Addiction
How do anger and addiction go together? We get this question all the time. They are related, and when you add stress and anxiety you get a toxic cocktail that causes many to numb out with substances and other diversions. Read more to understand how these all fit together and what you can do about […]
10 Break-Up Take-Aways
I needed some break-up take-aways to understand what happened and how I should feel about it. When a relationship is over, you don’t have to think of it as failed, but simply completed. Your break-up provides an uninvited opportunity to examine the past and future.