Can you love yourself is a question we all need to answer right now. And for some of us it’s not so easy to know. Everybody seems to be talking about self love these days, and it’s a confusing term. Especially right now when so many people are obsessed by narcissism. A lot of selfish, self loving people are pushing us around in a whole bunch of ways; and that doesn’t give self love a good vibration, as the Beach Boys would say. Remember them?
When self love goes too far
How many people do you know who love themselves too much? How many are selfish and self involved? It’s not fun to live or work with self-involved people, but the selfish ones are not necessarily toxic or hurtful. Some people who love and think only about themselves and their needs, however, actually have a disorder called narcissism. That takes selfishness to a much more destructive level and has a profoundly damaging impact on families and relationships. It’s important to clarify the difference between enough self love and too much.
Why is it important to love yourself
They say that you can’t love someone else or expect anyone to love you truly, safely and unconditionally unless you love yourself first. But what if you can’t imagine how to even begin loving yourself? You may have experienced neglect or substance or alcohol use disorder in your childhood. You would not be alone. In fact, 27 million Americans are adult children of alcoholics, and they’ve been taught suppress their own needs. Self respect can’t be learned when others don’t respect you. So, with all these different scenarios, how can you know the difference between selfish love and healthy self esteem, which leads to satisfying relationships.
Here are four pillars of self-esteem which is the heart of self love
1. Respect For Oneself
This is indispensable. If you don’t even value yourself and recognize yourself as a capable and important person, we have nothing. Love always starts with one’s own person. If I value myself and am able to see all of my virtues and my right to be happy, I will be capable of almost anything.
I am aware of my abilities and my limitations. I trust in myself to move forward with balance and security all along my life path. If I do not have confidence in myself, I lose control of my life. Or, what is worse, I leave it in the hands of others.
3. The Responsibility To Have Control Over Our Own Lives
You are the captain of your ship. You are not a cabin boy and definitely not a stowaway. It is necessary that we know from very early on how to make our own decisions, how to value ourselves more as people and to be brave.
4. The Belief That We Are Appreciated
Never look at your life from a perspective of loss, but always with one of possibility. One of ability. Recognize your virtues, your strengths, never your weak points. We are all allowed to be happy in this complex life; all that is required is assurance in oneself and courage. Never think that others are more deserving than you, or this will be the moment when you start to build walls up around your life. Do not make this mistake. four pillars come from Exploring Your Mind
The most important thing is to be good to yourself. In other words, this means you need to be treating yourself with the same kindness and support you would show to a dear friend. Self-compassion needs to be fueled with lots of tenderness and care.
Here are some benefits
By practicing self-love, you’ll drastically lower your stress levels, you’ll decrease your anxiety, and you will be much stronger in the face of depression. What’s more, once you start doing the things you enjoy, not being dependent on someone else, you will feel liberated, and you will be at peace with yourself.
Choosing yourself will be extremely beneficial for both your emotional and physical health. Once you realize how amazing taking care of yourself actually is, your mind, your heart, and your soul will gracefully blossom. The small details that you call imperfections will make you look unique.
Accept yourself as you are, and embrace all the little things that make you different. Fall in love with the things that make you… YOU. Be patient with yourself, and don’t stress over what you cannot control. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and move forward.
Self-love is all about spending valuable time with yourself, and understanding what’s good for you and what holds you back. And if that’s a person, who dims your light, let them go too. In order to grow, you need to leave everything that blocks your growth behind. Your future self will thank you for your bravery and your devotion to yourself. By letting go of toxicity, you will make space for the things that make your soul shine, and you will be able to reconnect with yourself. Loving yourself will teach you how to love people around you. read Date Yourself here