Do Excuses Keep You Caged

symptoms of codependency

We’re often beating ourselves up over something that has happened in the past, believing that there is something wrong with our ‘gut’ or our intuition. If only we could use a magic wand to break free from our excuse for anything and everything that makes us unhappy. But, would we choose relationships in which we are loved and valued for who we are, not who we would be thirty pounds lighter or thirty pounds heavier? We would choose freedom … free of the addiction that is driving our life, freedom from an often all-consuming grief, freedom to choose the path that fulfills us?

Do You See Yourself As A Victim

Instead, we see ourselves as magnets for whatever ails us. The slope gets slippery over time when our thoughts become our beliefs. When we see ourselves not as ourselves, but as how others have defined us – we compromise our desires and shield ourselves.

Some Excuses We Use

Some use money as an excuse – “I can’t afford” and “It’s too expensive” become the go-to lines whenever a conversation leans toward action.

Others excuse themselves with food. Their lives seem out of their control, so they grasp at something they can control. If weight gain is their issue, they subconsciously sabotage themselves with emotional eating which can easily spiral out of control and become lifestyle diseases like high blood pressure and diabetes are diagnosed.

Still others self-medicate. Alcohol, prescription, OTC and recreational drugs are their panacea for what ails. They are coping with life, but there is always something that comes up that drives them deeper into the haze. Combined with the physical and psychological aspects of an addiction, their bodies crave the antidote that will cure the demons in the present moment. The draw is all-consuming.

We Look To Others For A Call To Action

Regardless the excuse we use, we’re all looking for someone to give us a reason to change. We want to trust, to lose weight, to quit an addiction. Instead, we yield to societal definitions that keep us in our place – we are poor, broke, obese, and addicts. We readily adopt these labels and wait patiently for someone to to notice our pain and inspire our recovery. This is being outer directed. What if we reversed that pattern?

What if we showed up for ourselves, instead of waiting for someone else to do it for us?  If we recognized our own intuition and let that guide us. If we trusted ourselves to know what was in our best interest, and if we let other people do the same for themselves without any judgement. Wouldn’t that be the ultimate freedom.


coloring book purple pic