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Codependency is not useful in recovery so recognizing the codependency warning signs is critical

Who isn’t a little codependent when they enter recovery? If you’re worried you might be or see it in your family, don’t distress. This is something that can be managed. Learning the codependency warning signs first can help you begin separating yourself from someone else’s needs and demands. Then boundaries help break down where there is codependency.

First, did you know that codependency is common in families with addiction and substance abuse? Codependency is also common where there is a narcissist dominating family members. There are many degrees of codependency, and the severity of the condition is variable. In addition, enabling goes along with it. Warning signs of codependency can help you become aware of a relationship problem you need to address.

Second, not everyone experiencing the symptoms below suffers from codependency! However, these 20 questions may indicate another type of family disfunction, but still, signal that you may need help to start feeling better.

20 codependency Warning Signs

  1. Do you keep quiet to avoid arguments?
  2. Are you always worried about others’ opinions of you?
  3. Have you ever lived with someone with an alcohol or drug problem?
  4. Have you ever lived with someone who hits or belittles you?
  5. Are the opinions of others more important than your own?
  6. Do you have difficulty adjusting to changes at work or home?
  7. When significant others spend time with friends, do you feel rejected?
  8. Do you doubt your ability to be who you want to be?
  9. Are you uncomfortable expressing your true feelings to others?
  10. Have you ever felt inadequate?
  11. Do you feel like a “bad person” when you make a mistake?
  12. Do you have difficulty taking compliments or gifts?
  13. When your child or spouse makes a mistake, do you feel humiliated?
  14. Do you think people in your life would go downhill without your constant efforts?
  15. Do you frequently wish someone could help you get things done?
  16. Is it difficult for you to talk to people in authority, such as the police or your boss?
  17. Are you confused about who you are or where you are going with your life?
  18. Do you have trouble saying “no” when asked for help?
  19. Is it difficult for you to ask for help?
  20. Do you have so many things going at once that you can’t do justice to any of them?

If you identify with several of these symptoms, consider seeking professional help.  Arrange for a diagnostic evaluation with a licensed physician or psychologist experienced in treating co-dependency. Or, check out Al-Anon.org to learn about co dependency in families with addiction.

Check out my book  100 Tips For Growing Up

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Lindsey Glass

Lindsey Glass is the co-founder of Reach Out Recovery. Her 2016 ASAM Media Award winning documentary, The Secret World Of Recovery, has helped to lift the stigma from addiction and recovery and is used in recovery programs nationwide to show what life is like on the other side of addiction. Lindsey's teen prevention documentary, The Silent Majority, was distributed to PBS stations nationwide by American Public Television in 2014-15. Lindsey has written dozens of popular articles on recovery. She is a recovery advocate and frequent keynote speaker. Lindsey is the author of 100 Tips for Growing Up, My 20 Years of Recovery, 2019. Before focusing on recovery, Lindsey was a TV and screenwriter. She has worked in publishing, web development, and marketing.

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