Single moms have extra challenges. Separating and getting a divorce is always stressful. It’s often a lengthy process that exhausts and depresses both partners. Moms, especially take on extra burdens of care, and this may conflict with work demands as well as any possibility of having some quality of life of their own. If you’re a single mom struggling with work and childcare, you know what we mean. Navigating co-parenting and your new life as a single Mom is always challenging, and you will experience ups and downs. In fact, life can sometimes feel like a rollercoaster of highs and lows. We have come up with a guide to tips on self-care and staying on top of things for newly single Moms.
Seeing your parents get divorced is a traumatic experience for all children, and the breakup of their family has a lasting impact. Now that you are single you may want to go out dating and find a relationship with a new partner. This is not the best time, however, to bring new people into your children’s already unsettled life. Focus on supporting their need for stability and comfort to help them cope with the changes before starting to date again.
Even if you and your co-parent had lots of disagreements and arguments when you were together, this is the time to put your grievances aside and focus on prioritizing what’s best for your kids. Of course, you’re hurt and angry. As co-parents, however, everyone will adjust better if you co-operate and stick to your parenting schedule to provide your children with a sense of stability. Being dependable makes all the difference for your children. For example, if part of the arrangement is having your child Friday evening – Sunday evening every week, make sure that you keep your weekends free, and don’t let your child down by constantly cancelling and making other plans.
You and your ex giving each other the silent treatment or screaming at each other is both unproductive and hurts your children. Acting out anger will only add to your stress levels, too. For co-parenting arrangements to work, divorced couples should frequently communicate with one another in a calm manner. After all, you have shared responsibilities, and you may both have to contribute for things like your child’s schooling and medical care. This co-parenting app Onward helps divorced and separated parents to manage their shared expenses for their children.
Following your divorce, you may find yourself not able to cope with seeing your ex in-person, as it will only lead to experiences negative feelings all over again. Use texts and phone calls to stay safe.
We all know how important it is for your physical wellbeing to eat a healthy and balanced diet and stay active by doing plenty of exercise. But single Moms also need emotional support and tools for feeling whole, loved, and able to cope when you feel alone. Make a list of friends, neighbors, co-workers and family you chan use as your support network. Make the effort to stay in connected with your family and friends. It’s okay to talk about your worries and concerns, and remember that a problem shared is a problem halved. Some tips to support your mental wellbeing include meditation, yoga, a hobby that doesn’t conflict with childcare. Many single moms try online or in person therapy to talk about any issues they’re going through. If you are feeling particularly depressed or experiencing a mental health crisis, check out 18 resources for suicide prevention.
Also find some time in the day to spend to relax by yourself, write in your journal, or have a quiet cup of tea.
This is a hard time for relaxation, and many single moms worry at night for hours even when they’re exhausted. If you’re really worried about your future, sleep can be hard to come by. But it’s a vital part of your physical and mental wellbeing. Sleep deprivation causes even greater fatigue, a lack of energy and motivation, and can impact your physical health as well. Doctors recommend adults should ideally get around 8 hours of sleep a night. Even if you think you’ll never be happy or safe again, you need to focus on ways to relax at night when they children are sleeping and get some much needed shut-eye yourself. Here are some tips for getting to sleep.
Self-care for newly single Moms is definitely something that shouldn’t be overlooked. You may feel overwhelmed right now, but getting organized and prioritizing your needs will help you get stable and healthy.
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