Self Care For Parents: Make A Plan
Self care for parents is really important because the stresses and strains of caretaking can be overwhelming. But how do you fit self care in when you’re caring for others? Make a plan and stick to it. Parenting is one of the most rewarding, exhausting, and all-consuming jobs you’ll ever have. And there are some many wonderful parts to it – the love is unmatched. But there are some less great parts as well – the responsibility you’ve got to deal with is immense, and the mental and physical workload is enough to make anyone feel like they’re running on fumes.
Between night feeds, school runs, work, laundry, meal planning, and trying to remember if you actually drank water today, it’s easy for parents to put themselves last. But the important thing to remember is that if you’re constantly running on empty, you can’t be the best version of yourself for your kids. In the end, that means taking care of you isn’t selfish, but instead it’s essential. So, if you’ve been feeling like you’re just getting through the day rather than actually living it, here’s how to take care of yourself while still being the amazing parent you are. Read on to find out more.
Self Care For Parents 1: You Can’t Do Everything
Let’s start with something that’s so important to remember because it really can change the way you think about things for the better – the fact is, you’re not superhuman. No one can do it all, all the time. True, you might think you have to do that because parenting is a non-stop balancing act, but there’s absolutely no shame in admitting that some days are harder than others. There’s no shame in admitting that you need some help or, at the very least, that you need a rest.
If your house is messy, if your children had cereal for dinner, if you forgot to reply to an email… it’s all okay. It’s not a disaster. The world won’t end. The key to taking care of yourself is letting go of the unrealistic expectation that you have to be perfect because you don’t. No one expects you to be, except perhaps you.
Self Care For Parents 2: Carve Out Me Time
You probably don’t have hours to spend on self-care, and that’s fine – after all, who does, but when it comes to parents, any spare time often gets eaten up because you’re doing things for other people. But finding small moments for yourself every day is non-negotiable as it can really make a positive difference to your life, and to the lives of those around you. The truth is that even five minutes of intentional breathing, a quick walk, or a chapter of a book can reset your mind.
So how can you carve out this time for yourself? Is it even possible? Yes, although it will mean some changes in your life. For example, if mornings are chaos, try waking up 10 minutes earlier for a quiet coffee – that might be enough (see how you feel when you do it). If evenings feel rushed, build in a short break while the kids nap or play because it’s good for them (and you) to spend just a little time by themselves. It doesn’t have to be big or hours and hours, it just has to be time that’s totally yours.
Self Care For Parents 3: Nap When You Can
If we cay make sleep a priority, we know that’s hard to achieve. Sleep is usually the first thing to suffer when you’re raising little ones, but it’s also one of the most important things for your mental and physical wellbeing, so you’ll need to try to make it an important part of your life as much as you can – with exceptions when necessary, of course – as that’s going to help you stay healthy, happy, and a great parent. Take naps when you can. Even twenty minutes of sleep here and there can make all the difference.
If your baby or toddler is waking at night, focus on making sleep as easy as possible for everyone. Adjusting bedtime routines, keeping the room dark, and even small changes like choosing to lower crib mattress height as your baby grows can help improve their (and your) sleep. One by one these things might not do a lot, but when you add it all together and put sleep at the top of your must do list for the day, it’s going to be amazing how different things can become – for the better. And you’ll actually be taking care of yourself, so that’s great.
Self Care For Parents 4: Say No And Stick To It
When you’re a parent, you’ll be asked to do a lot of things. Loads of things. And it won’t just be your kids asking you for stuff – you’ll get requests from all over, such as school events, playdates, family obligations, work deadlines. But you don’t have to say yes to everything. That’s the real key here because a lot of the time we like to people please, but the problem with that is that it takes up all our time and energy, leaving us with nothing left for ourselves – and that’s not the way to take care of yourself. It’s also not a great lesson for your children either.
Of course, we’re not saying you have to turn down every opportunity or request – that would probably be just as bad as saying yes to everything because you’ll end up being bored and not moving forward, not to mention the fact that helping people – when it doesn’t impact negatively on you – is the right thing to do.
However, we are saying that you’ve got to pick and choose what you say yes to, and make sure it’s going to really fit in with your own responsibilities and things you’ve already got in place. If you can’t do something, say so. If you can and you don’t want to, don’t do it. And if you can do something and you do want to, go ahead!
Self Care For Parents 5: Ask For Help And Take It
Now this can be a tricky thing to even think about, let alone do, especially if you’re a private person, but it’s really worth admitting to yourself that you can’t do everything – no one can. And if there’s something you can’t do but it needs to be done, what’s the best course of action? It’s asking for help – but the catch is you can’t just ask for it, you’ve got to accept that help too.
So, what’s the lesson? You don’t have to do everything alone. Whether it’s your partner, a friend, a family member, or even a hired babysitter, you can and should lean on your support system. That’s what it’s there for. If someone offers to help, say yes. If you need a break, ask for it. There’s no shame in admitting that parenting is hard because it is, and to get through it happily and with great memories rather than lots of stress, it’s help that’s going to be so crucial.
Self Care For Parents 6: Let Go Of The Guilt
There’s this idea that good parents sacrifice everything for their kids, but the reality is, the best parents take care of themselves too, and when you prioritise your wellbeing, you’re setting an example – and that’s what good parenting is all about. You’re teaching your children that self-care matters, that balance is important, and that they don’t have to run themselves into the ground to be a great parent – what could be better than that?
So stop feeling guilty for needing a break and definitely stop apologising for putting yourself on your own to-do list – actually, put yourself right at the top! A happier, healthier you means a better, more present parent, and that’s the greatest gift you can give your kids. If that doesn’t give you motivation to take care of yourself, nothing will.
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