The silent treatment is the passive aggressive's best weapon
The silent treatment is the passive aggressive person’s #1 tool of abuse

The silent treatment is the passive aggressive’s go-to tool of control and abuse because it really hurts. It’s like nuclear annulation. When someone isn’t talking to you, looking at you or listening to you, you are effectively shut down, shut out.

The weapon that erases you

You may feel crazy. You wonder what’s wrong. What did you do? The passive aggressive won’t tell you. That’s his/her power. And there’s nothing you can do. If you hand silence right back, the passive aggressive will pretend to care, will ask what’s wrong and if you dare to tell him or her, a huge denial (but not an apology or a change) will result. Don’t let this kind of denial fool you, the act was intentional and will happen again. See how the passive aggressive works to seem benign but actually cause harm.

The Act of Passive Aggression
Do you know the signs of passive aggression

The silent treatment is a way to control you

Did your mother ever put you in the corner, or refuse to talk to you until you apologized for some wrong-doing? Mine did. Sometimes I didn’t know what I had done wrong, so I had to keep apologizing until I found the right thing. My mom didn’t suddenly start talking to me again. Sometimes, I’d make the right apology, but the silence continued for a while. The silence from a loved one made me doubt myself, and sometimes when people are quiet even now, it triggers my old fear of doing something wrong and being punished for it. The silent treatment can be a form of emotional abuse.

You can grow beyond it by better understanding yourself.


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Leslie Glass

Leslie Glass became a recovery advocate and co-founder of Reach Out Recovery in 2011, encouraged by her daughter Lindsey who had struggled with substances as a teen and young adult. Learning how to manage the family disease of addiction with no roadmap to follow inspired the mother and daughter to create Reach Out Recovery's website to help others experiencing the same life-threatening problems. Together they produced the the 2016 ASAM Media Award winning documentary, The Secret World of Recovery, and the teen prevention documentary, The Silent Majority, distributed by American Public Television. In her career, Leslie has worked in advertising, publishing, and magazines as a writer of both fiction and non fiction. She is the author of 9 bestselling crime novels, featuring NYPD Dt.Sgt. April Woo. Leslie has has served as a Public Member of the Middle States Commission of Higher Education and as a Trustee of the New York City Police Foundation. For from 1990 to 2017, Leslie was the Trustee of the Leslie Glass Foundation. Leslie is a proud member of Rotary International.

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